Valentines shmalentines
Is it wrong that I’m female, with a fiance and could really care less about Valentine’s Day?
Even if we didn’t have a wedding to pay for we wouldn’t be doing much of anything at all for one of the most ridiculous holidays of the year. People are buying up candy and flowers and jewelry for their valentines… which is exactly why the holiday seems to exist nowadays. It’s become nothing but a commercialized day to part well-meaning men and women from their hard-earned cash.
Now I’m not saying I don’t enjoy getting candy or flowers. I love chocolate and pretty things. I certainly like a classy piece of jewelry. But why does it have to be reserved for one day for the entire world? I would much rather have it be a personal holiday like an anniversary or even a just because kind of thing, not because Hallmark tells him to get me something.
Did I get the guy a card? You bet. Did he take me out for dinner last night? Yup. But it was a pizza place and nowhere fancy, which is a-OK with me. We spent a grand total of about $25 for our “celebrations,” and we have leftovers for lunch today. I’ll spend some time snuggling with him on the couch today, but I do that every day.
This holiday is kind of like telling people it’s the one day they can show their affection for each other. And I feel like for many couples, that may be exactly what it is. Why can’t every day be Valentine’s Day? Sappy, I know, but still, who needs a holiday to tell someone “I love you” by showering them with gifts? Wouldn’t it mean more just saying it straight from the heart in every day life?
We don’t need cards, gifts or fancy dinners to love each other, or to show people how we feel. We just do.
Take that, Hallmark!
Bed races and ducky derbies
I’ve realized that the tiny village I currently live in has some pretty hilarious events. I’ve known they exist, but I’ve never actually attended one until I was on a photo assignment for the newspaper.
My town hosts an Oktoberfest celebration. There’s always music and a car show. It’s an all-day thing and the biggest event is the bed race down Main Street. This is where teams of five, usually put together through various community organizations and businesses, literally make a twin-size bed with wheels and race them through the center of town. There are four pushers and a rider for each team. The teams decide what theme they want if any, which always produces some insane beds. This year included grass skirts and coconut bras along with a hospital-esque bed and scrubs.
This is not just a simple sprint-to-the-finish kind of race. The teams have to park at four stations along the way and complete a task to the satisfaction of the judges. The tasks change every year and the teams only find out what those tasks are just a few minutes before they have to start racing. This year’s challenges included the rider “shaving” the other four’s faces, getting the entire team passed through a hula hoop while holding hands, filling a pitcher with water using only ladles and changing the sheets before running through the finish line.
The actual races are utter madness. The team members all have to sign waivers in case of injury, which is completely and totally possible and probable. One team lost a wheel and a shoe, whose owner was almost run over as she tripped when her shoe came off. The race is hard work for the teams, and it absolutely hysterical to watch. I’ve never laughed so hard in my life while taking photos and doing my best to run along with the teams. The whole thing is just utterly ridiculous, but raises some good money for village events. I’d post photos, but I won’t because they all have people in them and I don’t want to cause problems so you’ll just have to use your imaginations. And get creative with those brain cells, because it really is quite something to see school administrators and support staff duke it out in a head-to-head race.
The second event is what they call a “Duck Derby.” There’s a ton of numbered rubber duckies, which are purchased by people throughout the week and on the day of Oktoberfest. They are then loaded into a drop cage before being dumped all at once into the river that runs through town. The object of the game is to be the sponsor for the first five ducks that make it to the finish line just a short way downriver. You win some of the money that came from the duck purchases, while the rest goes to future village events. I have never seen so many rubber duckies, nor have I ever seen a river full of them. Here’s a few photos to illustrate the idea for you:
Just after being released, the army of duckies goes over the dam.
If they make it past the rapids and rocks after the dam, the rubber ducks float down the river in their slow-paced race.
See what I mean? Completely and utterly ridiculous, but wonderful at the same time. All the kids love it and the adults certainly love the chance to feel like a kid again. It certainly helps that it was yet another absolutely gorgeous day outside, but I’ll definitely be going again next year even if it’s just to watch.
Insaniquarium insanity!
Have you ever heard of this computer game called “Insaniquarium!” by Pop Cap Games?
The premise of this game is ridiculously stupid. Your computer is turned into a fish tank where you must feed your fish so they grow and reach their full potential. When they are old enough, they essentially poop money that you click on to collect in order to buy more creatures to earn money faster. All this money goes toward buying three egg pieces that contain a new pet for your tank that has extra abilities. And oh yeah, you have to defend your fish from the aliens.
That’s right. Aliens.
The entire game is, quite appropriately, insane. It’s not surprising that it came as a freebie with the much more popular “Bejeweled.” My sister and I, however, have been addicted to it for weeks. ADDICTED. We can often be caught sneaking in a level or two and swearing at aliens when they get too close to our guppies. Why? That’s the funny part – I have no idea. Maybe it’s because the whole thing is so ridiculous that it’s fun. Or maybe it’s just proof that my family isn’t quite normal. But whatever the case, I find myself spending far more time than I intended collecting fish-poop money and blasting aliens with my lasers.
And get this – it’s got a virtual tank where you can continuously care for your fish and make your “tank” into a screensaver. Holy crap.
Crazy? No… INSANE!*
Please try it online and tell me I’m not going totally nuts and that it’s actually somewhat fun. I don’t want to be alone in my battle to save my money-pooping guppies from hungry aliens. I don’t want to be the only one who swears at my computer screen while blasting aliens and slowly but surely getting carpal tunnel syndrome from often frantic and sometimes continuous mouse clicking.
(*Please pardon my corniness.)
